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Over apologizing can be a habitual response that many people experience.

Over Apologizing

Over apologizing refers to the tendency to say "sorry" excessively, even when one is not at fault. This behavior can often stem from a desire to be polite or to avoid conflict. While apologizing can be appropriate in many situations, constantly saying sorry may indicate underlying issues.

Why Do We Do It?

Here are several reasons why people over-apologize:

Guilt and People Pleasing

Jocelyn Hamsher, a therapist in Arizona, identifies false guilt, carried guilt, and people-pleasing as common causes. False guilt involves feeling responsible for something beyond one's control, while carried guilt involves taking on guilt for someone else's actions. People-pleasing, on the other hand, is driven by a need to manage others' emotions and gain their approval.

Low Self-Esteem

Shahar Lawrence, a licensed clinical social worker in Utah and Nevada, suggests that low self-esteem is another significant factor. People with low self-esteem might feel they are taking up too much space or are being a burden, leading them to apologize frequently.

Mental Health Conditions

Over apologizing can also be associated with certain mental health conditions. Depression, social anxiety, generalized anxiety disorder (GAD), obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), borderline personality disorder (BPD), and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) are all conditions that may contribute to this behavior.

Society and Culture

Psychologist Yara Heary from Perth, Australia, adds that societal and cultural factors play a role. Women, particularly in patriarchal societies, tend to over apologize more due to societal expectations and doubts about their own worth and capabilities. This behavior can be a response to cultural norms that undervalue women's presence and contributions.

Trauma

Dr. Cynthia King, a clinical psychologist and co-founder of FemFwd, notes that over apologizing can also be a trauma response. Trauma survivors, especially those with prolonged abuse histories, may use excessive apologizing as a survival mechanism to avoid conflict and further harm.